Post from Kristie

Today is my 55 birthday and today I sit in a hospital room with a lot of mixed emotions. My son is again very very sick. He has been through so much emotionally and physically the last 18 mos, broken heart, leukemia, chemo, a wealthy fat man, relapse, grandma going to heaven, epilepsy, Disneyland, bone marrow transplant, shingles, sever diarrhea cause by adenovirus, bacteria infection, high fever... The list goes on.  Jesus is more real to me today than ever before.  I have all the head knowledge and now I have the heart knowledge. The Lord put a special Doctor on duty for Trent today ( or I should say for me today).  She is a Christian doctor and she is here at Choc to treat and pray.  I told her that I have been praying for healing and for The Lord to save my son, but now is a transition day...as much as I want healing for my son, it is breaking my heart to see him suffer!  I don't ask the doctors if he will get better because right now Gods sovereign plan is at hand.  Jerry and I have been trusting in him for some time and have emotionally and prayerfully given Trent to The Lord.  We have had faith in Jesus all along, but Trust seems like the next step after faith. Dr T. told me that Jesus was just holding me in his arms and I felt it, she was at the right place at the right time...that's just how the Lord works you know. I told Dr T. I think of Christ and all the suffering he went through and empathized with his mother. Though she new His purpose and His plan and that he was fully God incarnate she still (like me) is human and her heart must of been breaking as mine is now.  The suffering is so different.  My heart goes out to these patient's, families, nurses, doctors, all workforce at this hospital that doesn't know Christ as there savior. As I go through Romans, why does he harden some hearts and open others.  Why me...why has The Lord given some of us a love for him and not others....I told Dr T. that my heart burdens for the lost in this hospital and as my son has another shingle pain and I cannot help him, the only thing I can do for mankind is tell them about Gods sovereign plan through his Son.  Thank you all for your prayers for Trent and our family!!!